quick hospital update

so here we are in the hosp our stay began friday at 1230 am my anxiety began when her anc unexpectedly came back low 360 at the new clinic tues and we stopped chemo.  after which i bagged all trips to the store and only let the kids play at home and outside. despite that i knew thursday as boredom took us on a long exploratory walk in our new town as we hit a crowd still not sure what the event was but i immediately turned around for some reason i felt gracies forehead and it felt hotter than normal i was prob 1.5 milrs downhill away from home and had just told a friend how tired i was. hah so here kicks in the crazy adrenaline scared for my daughters life cancer mom in me as i ran uphill  really uphill not mildly home pushing 70 lbs. i stopped a couple times for fussy kids and to check on her always kicking my self for not having a thermometer in my bag. got home 98.6 normal but high for her norm. felt slightly crazy but my intuition told me something was off and my nerves felt it. i kept checking it went up to 99 then 99.6 then half hour after we lay down  about 1230 she wakes up miserable crying and we fight to get a temp of 100.7. BOO our awesome amazing 15 month fever free streak is up its off to the hospital. the night  was MISERY as i try to remember everything to have them do and not do while trying to comfort her. no dont take a rectal temp. yes we want to access her port not try a vein. no no tylenol. why dont we have an antibiotic. insert waiting crying two chest xrays awful catheter for urine sample after a major screaming port access and highly traumatized gracie who just hours b4 we had bathed with her shirt on bc she did not want her port exposed to anyone or anything cant blame her. here comes the swab shoved way up there then another the gag her in the throat. mommy i not want to be brave. im thinking i know honey me neither but i try to smile for her since she always tells me mommy dont cry or dont be sad be happy with a huge smile. we made it through the night she fell asleep after 5 am when we got to our room. her counts had dropped anc 88 definately admitted dr w called it profound neutropenia. next day we hoped it would be up. every morninr since its been 0. they want it showing a trend of increasing prob 200 at least before we leave could be tomorrow fingers crossed or several days to a week just a waiting game. fever is gone thank heavens shes had iv antibiotics every 6 hours since admit. hard to get her to eat and drink. shes getting bored and antsy of course cant leave her room.  cant blame her a bit. she keeps her port covered at all times with her blanket and say no touch my owie and machine is persons not mine cause it keeps beeping and they come fix it but i tell her they are just fixing the machine not touching her. she finds time to smile and laugh and always greets us with a smile when we show up and a hi mom hi dad or hi buddy. love her. love tyson. love todd hes spent the last three nights here with her. my parents and julie came out feiday and have been very helpful glad to know tyson is in good hands but i miss him. he popped his fifth tooth and his sixth is on its way. its almost his birthday. i cant  believe weve all almost survived this year and how big he is. heard from a few members in the ward/church we go to and they sound like they will be a great support its a comfort and look forward to meeting and getting to know them. hoping her anc goes up for those who dont know its the absolute neutrophil counts and neutrophils are the white blood cell that fight bacterial infections. hers are a bit fat 0 meaning not a single one to fight if she gets a bacterial infection. scary and stressful for us to see them so low. i dream of some normalcy for her and all of us going to the store the park playing with friends without worrying so much or wondering what her counts are and if she touched her face each second. shes a trooper hope she can go home soon and resume our cancer "norm" with higher counts and just being home. add her to your prayers if you will we know Heavenly Father hears each prayer and gives angels to watch over these kiddos.