I stopped counting when I hit 30 hairs on her tray. The poor thing has been eating her hair and finding her hair all over in her food the past few days. Here's a final picture of her pulling hair out of her mouth while eating...
Todd convinced me to shave her head after I saw her this morning once again pulling hair from her mouth...hair all over her food...I was pulling chunks of hair from her head...and there were handfuls of hair on the back of her nightgown to name a few places. I didn't want to do it...but as I thought about it I realized I would NEVER have been ready. So I steeled my emotions again and gave in...although this time even my steeled emotions involved a bit of crying. I said all along I wouldn't be the one to do it. So he did it. But of course I gave in at the end and helped with some of the spots he couldn't reach and looked funny. If we were going to shave it we at least had to do a good job.
So instead of being at church where we wish we could have been chasing her around like we would have been before cancer became our new life we stayed home and shaved her head and did our best to satisfy our kids...even though I'm not sure we even did that. The steroids are really getting to her these last few days...thankfully we're done Tuesday hopefully by Thursday they effects will be mostly gone.
Probably the perfect picture to show how each of us felt today...Ahhhh poor girl. I just wish I could take this all from her. In fact I hate that I have such long hair while hers is gone...Watch out for a drastic change:)
I was telling Todd today I just can't believe how strong she is. I mean she's doing it...she's battling cancer! I'm not even sure I can consider myself worthy to be her Mother...but I know I'm grateful that I am. I let her have a nap in my bed today while Dad cleaned up the hair all over hers. All I can say is I love that girl. She is just as sweet as they come.
I wish I could make this easier. How I love that little head . . . . with hair or without. I love all of you, and you're a wonderful mom, Andrea, I've witnessed it for almost 2 years now. This is a tough phase . . . . but this too shall pass. We just pray lots and lots for you.
ReplyDeleteAndrea, I cry along with you as I read and write this post. I'm so sad that you have to do such a difficult thing. She is so lucky to have such loving, giving parents, just as you are so lucky to have such a beautiful little girl who must have an amazing spirit to have to endure such a thing. I love you guys! I wish I could help more, if there is anything I can do, just ask!
ReplyDeleteThese pictures make it all so real. I know you live with the reality of it every day, but it broke my heart seeing her innocent little face, knowing that yes, she is a cancer patient. I'm bawling my eyes out right now. I'm sorry sweet Gracie. This isn't fair, and you shouldn't have to go through this. Andrea, I'm so sorry. I've retyped this paragraph about 3 times already, trying to figure out what to say. I just love you guys and my heart hurts knowing that Gracie is going through this. I'm just so so sorry.
ReplyDeleteI also need to add how cute she is. She really is beautiful with that adorable face and round head. Beautiful.
ReplyDeleteAndrea, wow, I love you so much. No one should have to go through such an emotional, painful, heartbreaking thing as this. She is the most beautiful thing in the whole world, with or without hair. And you are the most incredible person and mother, I wish we could be there for you and Todd. You both impress us so much, we look up to you more than you will ever know. There is a reason you are Gracie's parents, I don't know anyone who could do a better job. You are, as always, in our prayers! We love you so much and little miss Gracie!
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